I have a tendency to let things I have no control over, control me. I let the emotion I feel with these things take over, and I become an emotional basket case. Today, I am crying uncle. I can not let these things control me any longer.
I did not have the best therapy appointment yesterday, and for the rest of the day and night I was an emotional wreck. I was down, and let my sadness take over. I became angry at little things, and felt tense and agitated, even into my bed time. I could not sleep, my mind would not shut off. When that happens, my body gets restless and I just feel like I need to move. I was exhausted, and had a hard time keeping my eyes open, but when I would close them to sleep, I could not.
I need to let go. I need to let go of the things I can not control. A lot of the time, they have no meaning for my life, so there is no reason at all to stress about them. I woke up this morning, still feeling tense and sad. I sat on the couch with my daughter to watch the Smurfs (old school kind, only way to go), and realized it was silly of me to hold onto my frustration and anger towards my therapist. He had made me feel like my problems were less important than someone elses, but if I let that consume me than I will be no good to my family, or myself.
I go back on Tuesday to see him, and I will bring up how I felt, but I have let it go as of this morning. I have things to do, like prepare for school. I found last night that holding onto those emotions prevented me from being able to concentrate on my reading for school. I can not let that happen again. My classes are too short for me to let outside interferences get in my way.
I actually feel better this morning, after letting go. It’s quite liberating. My mind is clear and focused, and instead of snapping at my daughter for no reason, we are playing and having fun. I think this afternoon I will be able to read for my classes like I had planned. It’s amazing how we let our thoughts and emotions control us.
A friend of mine added some inspirational, and sometimes funny, images to her Facebook page. I have stolen some because they made me feel a little more confident, and every could use some inspiration now and then: